Not Fun At All

Today’s post is kind of a whiny one. So be it.

I have never discussed where I work. You don’t know the name of the company. That’s the way I want it to stay. This blog is about other stuff, not specific corporations.

However, I have a friend who works at a big company that is downsizing. Why are they downsizing? I’d guess that they want the stockholders to be happy. They might even be preparing the place for sale. That always starts with “trimming the fat” and making the place more attractive to purchasers.

Whatever the reason, along with downsizing there always comes the “We need to work smarter, not harder” phase of stupid. 

What is that phase? Well, in my personal experience, it has meant that in 7  of my 7 employers (including different groups within the same companies) there is inevitably the battle cry from management “Cross Train!!!!!” 

Ugh. Let me explain, for those of you in management around the planet: it is no longer 1750 in the British Colonies of the Americas. That’s when the industrial revolution started, and this crazy thing called “specialization of labor” kicked in. The theory, crazy as it sounds, is that if you have people do a single set of unified tasks they will get better at those tasks. If you have everyone do everything, they will commensurately suck at some of them.

I might add that in 7 of the 7 times I’ve personally ridden that train, the cross-training/work experiment collapsed in about 30 days. Why?  Because not everyone is good at everything. If you have people knocking it out of the park every day, why would you take them from the batting rotation and hand them a lawnmower? “Here, Dunlap, take this mower and make sure the field is properly striped for today’s game.” Dunlap then has to learn how to operate the mower, have someone explain the technique for “striping” turf (harder than it sounds), and then let him screw up until he gets it right. 

In the meantime, Reynolds has to put down his landscaping tools and find a uniform and cleats. He hasn’t swung a bat since his junior high school days – a solid couple of decades before. He’s nervous and upset that he’s not done at noon on game day, and instead has to go out in front of 10,000 fans at the park and face an experienced pitcher. The other team, you see, didn’t cross train this week. 

The game gets going and the field looks like crap. Missed tufts of grass all over left field, the lines between the bases are wavy and have gaps. After the first inning, the cross-trained team is down in 3 outs and takes the field where they make 57 errors. Only the fact that the manager kept a couple of ringers in reserve to rescue the thing from a total fiasco makes it even bearable to watch the game. We don’t even want to talk about the hygiene levels in the concession stands where the team’s trainers are making snacks. The first inning ends with the score 27-0. It would be higher, but the other team was tired from running the bases. 

How else does this impact the players, concession stand workers, and groundskeepers? Well, all of them are stressed from having to learn new tasks. We all get comfortable in our grooves, and most of us select our jobs based on what we like to do. Each resents being uprooted from their routine and comfort levels. Some mutter for the entire day about how they liked what they did and wish they could do it again.

Thirty days later they all go back to what they should do. Except for two of the groundskeepers who just retired instead of putting up with the stress.

My friend is miserable at work. He hates his job, whereas a week ago he loved his job. I feel for him. 

Nice move, big company.

 

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Joseph Courtemanche

About Joseph Courtemanche

I'm a conservative Christian author who's been happily married for over 30 years. I am a Veteran of the United States Navy, Naval Security Group. I speak a few languages, I have an absurd sense of humor and I'm proud to be an American.

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