So, Isn’t It Time You Learned CPR? (ATTENTION TWIN CITIES!)

Yeah, it’s on the list… etc. I used to be an instructor (about 7 billion years ago) and taught a lot of people how it worked. True story: I was UA (Unauthorized Absence, the Navy equivalent of AWOL) for not teaching a scheduled CPR class when I was stationed in Spain. Somebody forgot to tell the training division that I was kind of busy off the coast of some foreign land. I’d never before, or since, used this defense, but I loved it: “I was out of the country, I can’t tell you where, and you don’t have the need to know. Now tear up the charges.” I hope I never need it again.

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Why do I mention this? Because a charity I believe in is doing some down-and-dirty CPR training in January in the Twin Cities. The poster is right here for you to see. Please consider this as an event to attend with your adult friends. It raises funds for a great cause and they guy teaching it is a super individual. I’d even bet that if you email him he’d work with you to do it in another venue to raise funds some other time – hint, hint, corporate safety people…

This is the best deal going for really learning CPR, and it benefits a great charity.

This is the best deal going for really learning CPR, and it benefits a great charity.

The reason for this event is pretty simple: Haiti has no viable paramedic structure. If you have a heart attack outside of a hospital (and possibly in some of the hospitals) you’re toast without an AED to restart your heart. AEDs are very simple to use and they save lives. Please consider either donating to the cause or attending the training.

Another Item On Stormy’s List.

Stormy has a long list of things she objects to on a daily basis. Some she truly hates, some she dislikes, some she is afraid of to the degree where she hides out in another room.

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Doctor Stormy.

Doctor Stormy.

We have added another item to the list: snow shoveling.

Last winter she was considered too great a flight risk to be out in the yard without a leash for the first month. After that, we let her out for very short periods and watched her from the doorway. Only come the spring did she get unobserved time in the yard. That meant that she was not loose when I shoveled or blew snow: the gates were opened and closed and she could escape.

This morning, at 05:28, we discovered that she doesn’t like snow shoveling. Rather vocal about it as a matter of fact. It took us a little while to work the issue out, and by the time the back sidewalk was done she was over her anger but firm in her fear. She literally hid behind the tree.

It is time to post the list. I now present, in no particular order, the list of things that Stormy objects to:

snow shoveling
Zamboni machines
vacuum cleaners
snow plows
school buses
garbage trucks
people in her alley
pigeons
sparrows
industrial lawn mowers
jet airplanes
propeller aircraft
helicopters
satellite dishes
cables and power lines (on windy days)
squirrels (really a sore spot)
rabbits
any diesel engine
neighbors in their yards
chickens
neighbors in their garages
Lulu (the neighbor’s dog, possibly an arch-villain in her universe)
electric shavers
wet grass
cold pavement
snow between her paw pads
chihuahuas

The “like list” is much shorter:

food
belly rubs
sleeping on my bed
nibbling
snoring

Get the picture. I sure love that dog.

NERD Alert.

I just spent an hour in nerd heaven because I’d stumbled upon a television show about the Apollo Navigation Computer.

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Yup. That passes for really rocking entertainment in my world. If you will give me a minute I’ll tell you why that sort of show on The Science Channel makes guys like me smile and jitter with anticipation.

I grew up during the Apollo years. I built little erector set models of the launch tower, ate Space Food Sticks, drank Tang and watched the launches. I never got blase about the program.

I marvel about once a week that my cell phone has more computer capability than the computer that they used on the spaceship. Boggles my mind. It’s so easy to take this stuff for granted – and such a tragedy that we do so.

What piece of technology still amazes you after all the years? And, more importantly, why does it amaze you?

Today We Celebrate The True Meaning Of Christmas: Jesus Christ.

Each year that I have been blessed enough to portray Saint Nicholas, I’ve taken the responsibility a little more seriously. About three years ago I started thinking about doing a video of Santa talking to the world about what Christmas really means. I had decided to make this the year to do the video.

About a month ago, my friends at KTIS contacted me and asked if I would participate in a video about Christmas. They sent me a script. It was very close to what I had been imagining. I dashed off a revision in about an hour and sent it back. They agreed to every word that I changed.

A week later we were in the studio. The result is below this paragraph. I hope you will watch it and then read the words below. I have a request to make, but I would like you to watch the video first. Here it is:


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Can A Great Sentence Be Worth The Interruption In Flow?

That question bedevils some writers in their production of words for public consumption. I am often beset by the conundrum in my writing. It’s a sticky question that I’ll lay out for you below. And I’ll do it quickly, no long post today.

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There is a school of thought among many authors and editors that the flow of the story is paramount. You must not interrupt that flow with anything flashy, superlative, or daring that brings the reader out of the story. The idea is that you will submerge the reader in the tale so effectively that they will continue reading and lose track of reality.

There is another school, to which I belong, that says that an elegant, witty, snappy, jarring sentence or paragraph is a joy to the serious reader. It is one of those moments when you sit back, put down the book for a moment, and contemplate what an elegant and beautiful thing you have just experienced. You can taste the food, feel the mood, marvel at the clever dialogue, or simply say, “Wow. That guy can really write.”

It is something that I’ve always enjoyed as a reader. Whether it was Len Deighton, Tom Clancy, The Apostle Paul, or Lee Child, I love it when the author has gifted me with an outstanding piece of prose. Something so shatteringly clever or beautiful that I want to write it down and repeat it out loud a week from now.

Great movie dialogue is similar. It pulls you out of the story for a moment and makes you laugh or weep. It makes you consider your own life and how that sentence on the screen reflects what you know. I recently watched an old war movie from the 1940s. It wasn’t a big thinker of a movie in any way. But a couple of bits of dialogue keep running through my head because it is just how I would have loved to express the thought. One I remember is a scene where an older woman is talking to an older sailor at a USO dance. I will paraphrase because I may have dropped a word in her dialogue.

“I understand you recently got a raise?”

“Yes, I did.”

“How will you spend the money?”

“Oh, some on women, some on beer, the rest foolishly.”

That elegant, wonderful sentence made the movie for me. Is it wrong to want to gift a reader with something similar in one of my books?

What is the most memorable sentence you’ve ever read in a book or heard in a movie? And, more importantly, why do you remember it?