Stormy Versus The Garden Hose.

Sooner or later you’d think she’d learn. Then again, I don’t pick up on things all that quickly and she is my canine companion. There’s video below, but here’s a picture for your entertainment in the meantime.

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Stormy is never quite sure what will be the most annoying part of her day. It might be a diesel engine, a small child screaming in the park, birds flying in her yard, strangers in the alley, or the evil garden hose.

Over the past few months she’s become more and more insane when the hose comes out. What you don’t see in the video is her athletic performance in trying to get that stream of water. Both before and after the video I tried really hard to keep her dry. Good luck.

The neighbors would drive down the alley and remark to each other, “Dear, why is Joe sitting in a lawn chair with his right arm held high over his head.” The answer would be, “Because that stupid dog can’t jump that high and it keeps her dry.” Yes, I sat there like some lunatic version of the Statue of Liberty so that the stream of water was over her head even when she jumped.

Why the lawn chair? Well, glad you asked. I’ve done more walking and spent more time on my feet in the last three days than I have in years. My tootsies are sore and mildly blistered. After a day on them once again, I voted for sitting in comfort and watering my garden and the new lilac bushes. That’s when the deranged sheep dog attacked the water. Without further ado, I present the video:

If I didn’t turn the water off she’d drown in her own yard. She is absolutely insatiable when she gets going on that kick, biting the stream of water until she’s got a lung full. Nuttier than a Snickers bar. She’s sneaky as well. Did you notice the casual approach to the water? What isn’t clear in the video is the eyeballing going on out of camera shot. She was planning her approach. I can be out there for an hour, and at random intervals she’ll come screaming in from the side and leap through the stream. I don’t know about you, but those fangs look dangerous to me. I’d hate to see what she could do with them if cornered.

There’s a drippy dog in my living room right now. Much drier than a few hours ago, but still a bit moist around the edges. I love that goof. She’s always coming up with some new quirk. I hope you liked this one.

Say a little prayer for her. Part of the funny is her obsessive behavior coupled with anxiety. It’s good to see her on the attack: means she’s not taking it lying down. She still needs to know that I’ll protect her from anything within my power – except the hose. She’s on her own for that dingy idea.

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