Precisely 23 – Conclusion.

My apologies for the delay on this opus. Illness and bandwagons got in the way.

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Mark tagged the mouse button for the sixth time in four seconds. The computer seemed to have slowed down unreasonably. To those at adjacent desks, Mark had sped up to his old pace, but seemed to have kept it together compared to his outburst a few months previously.

He did feel better, especially since the medications had all done their jobs and he had been able to dispense with them. Same thing for his psychiatrist, a woman he viewed as a major impediment to his well-being. He’d let her go with a very nice summary of all her flaws just two weeks previously. Since his employer hadn’t taken any formal action against him for his loss of control, the doctor was under no obligation to let them know that Mark had probably gone off the rails once again.

The alloted time for sitting at his desk was now over, his phone had vibrated announcing the arrival of his break. Route “C” today as he checked things around the office. Seven minutes later he’d verified the proper placement of each and every item in the public areas of the office, including the bulletin boards: 23 tacks precisely, all neatly aligned.

Janice and Jorge had never been identified by management as Mark’s tormentors. Neither had they identified each other. Each knew that there was another involved in the project, as both knew that too many things had taken place that they had no clue about. But that had faded into the past. Each, however, kept a weather eye on Mark: as astute observers they had noted his swing back toward the manic. Subtle, yet quite pronounced if you knew what to look for in his behavior.

Lunch came and went, popcorn and sandwiches, burgers and fries, a pizza, and at least two people with gigantic gyros from the foodtrucks on the plaza below. A gentle fug of grease and garlic wafted over the room. Mark hated the smell. He resented his fellows slipping away to the plaza below when they should be working. He watched each and every one of them as they gloated over their misdeeds.

At 2:18 precisely Shanique, the administrative assistant, walked down the aisle next to Mark’s desk, headed for the far side of the office where her cube was snugged far away from the lunchroom, but adjacent to the printers and shredding machines. As she passed she rattled a glass jar in her left hand. In her right, she carried a pile of papers.

Mark vaulted from his chair, and in a move that would have put the late John Belushi to shame, he landed on his feet facing the opposite direction.

His suspicions were confirmed: the bulletin board was devoid of content – and thumbtacks. Both of which were being carried along the aisle by Shanique. At long last his assailant had a face and a name.

Swooping to his left, he grabbed the bowling ball from it’s perch on Eric’s desk, and with a grace unexpected from anyone as uncoordinated as Mark, he hurled the ball, overhand, directly at Shanique’s back. Any olympic shot-put competitor would have been proud.

Shanique turned to her right when she got to the window, which undoubtedly saved her life. A split second later the bowling ball whistled past her head and shattered the floor-to-ceiling window at the edge of the room. In shock, she turned to see what had happened just as the air pressure difference between the building and the windy urban canyon on the other side equalized. With a thundering roar, the window gave way and imploded in toward the occupants of the room.

It was so loud that it nearly drowned out the banshee scream of Mark Alveson as he charged won the row, took a face full of glass shards, and tackled Shanique around the waist. Both vanished from the 27th floor as the last of the glass landed on the carpet, and the two of them raced toward the egg roll vendor on the plaza below.

Jorge and Janice both rushed toward the window opening. Halting a few feet short, they stared at each other. Janice broke the silence, “That certainly didn’t work out the way I planned.”

Jorge nodded slowly. “Too bad. I really liked those chicken egg rolls.”

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Assault on Saint Agnes is now available. Just click this link to find all the options! (I recommend the autographed copy. It’s cheaper than from the big stores, I scribble in it, and you get it mailed within 5 days. We all win.

When you finish reading any book (especially mine) please review it at www.amazon.com, www.barnesandnoble.com, and www.goodreads.com. Your review increases the chances of someone looking for a new book greatly. Authors appreciate your review, even if it is just “I thought this was a good read and will give it to my dog to chew. I especially liked the ending, because it made me feel better when he killed all of the main characters. (no spoilers, please)” Those few words (more than 20, fewer than 1,000 is ideal), and a 1-5 rating, make or break how the search engines find us. Thanks in advance.

Man, Did This Blog Ever Derail.

Today I was going to work you into the next part of 23 Precisely. One line about football at the top of the blog was my plan. Guess you’d better come back Thursday for the story, this kind of got away from me.

Please follow me on Twitter, and “Like” the Facebook author page. Don’t forget to subscribe (the box is on the right side of the page) to be eligible for free e-books and other benefits! Oh yeah – grab a copy of Assault on Saint Agnes if you’re of a mind.

Never one to be too far behind on social trends….. well, we all know that’s hogwash. But as a native Minnesotan I’d be remiss if I didn’t note that October 10, 2016 marks the official beginning of the Vikings bandwagon. Yes, all of those people who keep their team flags hidden in the attic until they’re “pretty sure” can now take them out, fly them on their cars, raise them on the flagpole in the front yard (it had better be below the American flag), and hang them over their cube. Face painting at the office today is optional.

If you lived in Green Bay, Wisconsin, the Packers stuff is on display year round. But while a mere 300 miles (and several large cheese shops) separate the two, they are culturally very different. Packers fans are not so much rabid as devout. Vikings fans are fickle.

Once the Vikings end their season there will be a gigantic round of “I told you so!” throughout the state. Doesn’t matter if they win the Superbowl, or blow it in the final game of the season. Nope, every idiot you ask will have predicted it just as it happened. I will not be one of those idiots. Not that I’m not an idiot, but I just can’t find a seat on the sports bandwagon at my age. Not that sports aren’t fun, that I don’t enjoy a few minutes of some games on television, or participating in some outdoor activities (snowshoeing anyone?) Instead, I simply find myself having invested too much of my enthusiasm in a hockey team that left the state and took my love of the sport with it. That spot of cancer spread to the rest of my sports body.

So while the nation debated third-string quarterbacks that kneeled when they should have stood, mourned baseball players who drove their boat up on the rocks, and ranted about some guy with wrinkly swimmer’s skin who lied about a robbery in Brazil, I spent that time with my wife and dog. We enjoyed a nice summer, worked on our house, sat on the back steps, and walked all over the cities. I listened to exactly 0.0 minutes of sports radio, read 0 paragraphs of the sports pages, but did watch some documentaries on sports on Netflix. Not a one was about the game, or the team, but usually about the fans or some special relationship among the players.

I don’t think I missed anything. And today I won’t be talking about Sunday’s game anywhere but right here. I like the Vikings management and players. I know them as people, not a franchise. And most of them are fine folks. I look forward to seeing them at the team party while I wear my purple suit. I don’t wish them ill, but I won’t grab the Ginsu and head for a bridge if they have a bad season.

That’s just me. The me who will still marvel at the bandwagon as it rolls by on the street. I just won’t get crushed beneath it. God’s given me too many other things to do.

Have a fantastic day. Wander back this week for more of the short story on Thursday. Perhaps some bon-mot on Wednesday. You never know: I have time on my hands.
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Assault on Saint Agnes is now available. Just click this link to find all the options! (I recommend the autographed copy. It’s cheaper than from the big stores, I scribble in it, and you get it mailed within 5 days. We all win.

When you finish reading any book (especially mine) please review it at www.amazon.com, www.barnesandnoble.com, and www.goodreads.com. Your review increases the chances of someone looking for a new book greatly. Authors appreciate your review, even if it is just “I thought this was a good read and will give it to my dog to chew. I especially liked the ending, because it made me feel better when he killed all of the main characters. (no spoilers, please)” Those few words (more than 20, fewer than 1,000 is ideal), and a 1-5 rating, make or break how the search engines find us. Thanks in advance.

An Apology To My Reader (Hopefully Plural, But I’m Sure About Mom.)

Mom:

I am not going to submit my short story installment today. Good intentions, but they all went south when I got my anti-venom injection on Wednesday.

Not a reaction that requires medical attention, but I truly feel horrible from that experience. Benadryl, popcorn, and bed are the prescription. I know I’ll feel better in the morning.

I will continue the story next week. My apologies for not completing my assigned homework today.

I hope you all have a great weekend, and I’ll be back in my usual annoying form next week.

Joe

23 Precisely – Part III

So, back to the story. Some book reviews coming to this space soon. Surely, a political rant as well. Heck, that’s why you’re here, isn’t it?
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Please follow me on Twitter, and “Like” the Facebook author page. Don’t forget to subscribe (the box is on the right side of the page) to be eligible for free e-books and other benefits! Oh yeah – grab a copy of Assault on Saint Agnes if you’re of a mind.

In the past six weeks, quiet had returned to the workplace. Janice and Jorge had gone undetected, Mark’s ravings were attributed to his psychotic break. Fortunately for all involved, his employer (if not his coworkers) was well aware that mental health problems were just that: health problems. Consequently, since there was no damage done and no physical harm to anyone except Mark, he’d been well cared for on an extended leave of absence vice facing any disciplinary action .

A long stay with a top-shelf care facility had given him a new life, some respite from his anxieties with the proper medication, and time to decompress. He’d been in a self-imposed exile from reality for years and was actually happy to have it brought to his attention. He’d adopted a cat, eaten good meals in nice restaurants, and begun a physical fitness program that included long walks along the base of the foothills.

Monday. Monday he would return to work. He reached out to his group on Thursday night, seeking affirmation that it was perfectly normal to be nervous about going back into that office with a few issues unresolved. Friday afternoon he’d met with his boss and the H.R. Director in a different branch office where nobody knew him. They read through his accounts of the episode, the doctor’s release, and chatted with Mark about how we was going to handle the stress that went with his very high-tech job.

Satisfied, they mutually agreed to a return on Monday morning.

Mark made it through the first day without any hitches being obvious to the multitude watching his every move. One good soul had even brought him a cookie-bouquet and a welcome card. Others stopped by during the day to say a kind word and let him know that they’d missed his help during the busiest time of the year.

To Mark, that sounded like a criticism instead of a laudatory reference to his sterling work ethic. He counted his numbers at the end of the day and realized he was 37% below his usual norms. That wouldn’t do.

Tuesday morning Mark had fed the cat and taken most of his medication when the phone rang. Another robo-caller letting him know that his non-existent student loan could be refinanced. When Mark returned to the kitchen counter where he kept his medication, he halted for a moment. This one, the last he was to take, this was the one. The doctor warned him that it might make him drowsy or a bit slower on the mark than usual. He had felt a little behind yesterday, 37% to be precise. Skip it. It was one of many, not that important.

The next three weeks moved into the rear-view mirror with no glitches. Mark gradually picked up the pace at work until he was back within 2% of his normal production. And down three of the prescribed medications to attain that lofty goal. He didn’t realize that even on his worst day he was 85% more productive than any of his peers. To him, he was just hitting normal three weeks into the game.

Next week he’d trim one more medication and the be back where he should be. He’d thought long and hard about it last night while taking his walk. Even the cat agreed: he was doing just fine. He’d asked.

The cat had answered.

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Come back Thursday for the next installment of 23 Precisely.

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Assault on Saint Agnes is now available. Just click this link to find all the options! (I recommend the autographed copy. It’s cheaper than from the big stores, I scribble in it, and you get it mailed within 5 days. We all win.

When you finish reading any book (especially mine) please review it at www.amazon.com, www.barnesandnoble.com, and www.goodreads.com. Your review increases the chances of someone looking for a new book greatly. Authors appreciate your review, even if it is just “I thought this was a good read and will give it to my dog to chew. I especially liked the ending, because it made me feel better when he killed all of the main characters. (no spoilers, please)” Those few words (more than 20, fewer than 1,000 is ideal), and a 1-5 rating, make or break how the search engines find us. Thanks in advance.

23 Precisely – Part II

We will shortly continue with the story, but a bit of politics first.

If you are voting early, you probably fall into one of two categories: the hopeless party hack (on either side) who would vote for Satan’s dog if she had the right party affiliation. Or, perhaps, you are just confused, or unhappy, with the candidates and want to pull the trigger and be done with it this year.

I urge you to hold out until election day. One measly day every four years and you’re too busy to vote that day? Short of a planned trip out of the country, and casting your vote before you hop on the plane, you have no excuse. Wait. See what develops. Stand in line for a whole hour if you need to do so. At the very least, wait until the last moment before you leave to cast that absentee ballot. But for the love of your country, don’t just mark a box and put the thing in the mail to get it out of the way.

Things will happen between now and election day. Don’t be like the primary voters in Arizona who voted for a candidate on the early ballot, and found out that he was no longer a candidate on the actual voting day. Make your vote count. Read something other than the Huffington Post before you decide. Watch another channel besides Fox News. Get out of whatever mental box you live inside.

Then, and only then, on election day cast your ballot. A lot of good people have given their lives over the years to give you that right. Don’t blow it so that your convenience needs are satisfied. Work to keep earning that right every day.

Please follow me on Twitter, and “Like” the Facebook author page. Don’t forget to subscribe (the box is on the right side of the page) to be eligible for free e-books and other benefits! Oh yeah – grab a copy of Assault on Saint Agnes if you’re of a mind.

Mark Alveson stood in front of the bulletin board and stared. His heart thundered in his ears and he started to sway like a stalk of wheat in a high wind. Before he fell down, he managed to plop into a chair and progress to hyperventilation. Within a minute, he was able to once again focus his eyes, which were immediately drawn to the bulletin board. It was exactly what he thought he’d seen: someone had replaced all of the thumbtacks with staples.

Each document was in the exact same place it had been at the beginning of the shift, but instead of being held by a 7/16 steel thumbtack they were stapled with red-plastic coated staples. Panic welded him to the chair as he evaluated the situation. Exploding from the chair like a cork from a bottle of cheap sparkling wine, he ran out of the lunch room door, proceeded along route “G” and sprinted to his desk. Every head in the office turned to follow him as he thundered down the aisles, apparently at random, hardly in a straight line, but with a purpose.

The top, right drawer in his desk left it’s rails and emptied its contents on the floor with a tinkling noise. Thousands of 7/16 and 3/8 inch thumbtacks spilled from the two special jars he’d bought for them on a trip to Belize several years before. Intermingled on the floor, grabbing at the carpet, they tore minuscule ravines in his fingers and palms as he scooped them back into the now blood-stained jars. He’d sort them later, but right now he needed to fix the board.

Running back to the lunch room, this time along route “E”, he narrowly avoided knocking down the IT person lugging a monitor down the aisle.

With a splatter of blood, he grabbed the door frame and spun into the lunch room where he remained for seven minutes and sixteen seconds. When he emerged, his bloody fingernail stumps revealed the price he’d paid for forgetting the staple puller on his desk. The pain was soon forgotten as the warmth of satisfaction spread across his face. A quick triple-wash of the hands in the restroom, and the used towels taken to clean the door frame, and he was done. He now strolled down route “M” to his desk where he gingerly inserted the drawer once again, and loaded his Belizian jars into his backpack to be sorted out at home.

He barely felt the gentle hand of his manager Ann as she asked him to step into the conference room. He certainly didn’t notice the look of glee on Jorge’s face, nor the look of panic on that of Janice.

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Come back Tuesday for the next installment of 23 tacks.

********* ********** *********** ***********

 

Assault on Saint Agnes is now available. Just click this link to find all the options! (I recommend the autographed copy. It’s cheaper than from the big stores, I scribble in it, and you get it mailed within 5 days. We all win.

When you finish reading any book (especially mine) please review it at www.amazon.com, www.barnesandnoble.com, and www.goodreads.com. Your review increases the chances of someone looking for a new book greatly. Authors appreciate your review, even if it is just “I thought this was a good read and will give it to my dog to chew. I especially liked the ending, because it made me feel better when he killed all of the main characters. (no spoilers, please)” Those few words (more than 20, fewer than 1,000 is ideal), and a 1-5 rating, make or break how the search engines find us. Thanks in advance.