Bad Decisions Are Reflected In The Trash On The Road

There is an entire field of study devoted to studying what is left behind by humans in their trash dumps: Archeology. In my universe it might be reflected by the more modern term of garbology.

Either way, it works out like this: cheap washing machines, microwaves, worn tires, and general trash litter the roads throughout our nation. You get used to seeing some of them and write off the vermin that pitch stuff out of the back of their truck as hopeless members of the swine community. 

For the past two years, I have been walking the roads around my house in Florida on a regular basis. You get to to the point where you are familiar with all the spots the farm workers (I live near several industrial-sized farms) throw their crap out of the windows as they zoom home, or back from dinner. Wrappers and beer cans all over one road in particular.

This past week I noticed a trend in the trash: no longer was Nodelo the favored can on the top layer of trash.

Now, I have to say, that Nodelo is on sale around this area all the time, and was without a doubt the cheapest cerveza you can buy in most liquor stores. Speaking from my experience as a beer drinker, when its 95 degrees, sunny, and the end of a long day, even a mediocre beer (or five) is a darned fine thing. You ain’t sippin’ cognac to cool off as you blast down the dirt road next to the swamp on the way home from the farm.

However, as a practiced garbologist, it became abundantly clear to me that something major had changed in the past two months. Nodelo is virtually absent (as are other brands) on the road itself, and exists only on the shoulders of the road where all older trash migrates.

Nope, the new champion beer of choice for thirsty farm workers is Spud Light. Yes, almost all of the cans flattened by vehicles on my route are now Spud Light.

Is this because the population from Guatemala, El Salvador, Mexico, and Venezuela is the rock upon which the LGBTQIA+%& movement is based?

Again, no. You see, the retailers around here are giving the crap away because they can’t sell it. You won’t find a cheaper beer in this area than Spud Light. Over the most recent holiday weekend, you could buy a big box of it for $15 and mail in a proof of purchase to get a voucher for $15. Your beer is free if you just wait a while for the coupon to arrive.

Free beer, as any sailor can tell you, is the best beer. Dullan Mulveigny does not impact the sale of crappy beer to thirsty people with no money. They don’t care. But the retailers certainly do, and they can’t unload it fast enough to make shelf space for the next brand to push into it’s place.

Interestingly, Nodelo is now the top of the heap for sales, having taken Spud Light to the cleaners. I delight in the pushback on Transheiser Bush pushing their viewpoint out there and getting clobbered. They didn’t appreciate their market, and when they decided to change it, they skipped out into the middle of the minefield and then did belly flops to see what would happen. It wasn’t pretty.

I’ll keep you posted if this changes, but for the moment it’s nothing but blue cans on my walking route.

[Note: I purposely chose my images and didnt spell things correctly to avoid any major corporations having a problem with me.]


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Joseph Courtemanche

About Joseph Courtemanche

I'm a conservative Christian author who's been happily married for over 30 years. I am a Veteran of the United States Navy, Naval Security Group. I speak a few languages, I have an absurd sense of humor and I'm proud to be an American.

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